Have you ever met someone that was a desolate person? They never have anything nice to say at all. They’re never in a good mood. They look at everything like it is a problem. They are just a miserable ass person.
We all know those type of people. Do you understand how much energy it takes to look at world through mud-colored glasses? That takes true commitment to suffering. You take your own self-torment to the highest level possible and then include everyone else in your Debby downer-ness.
The funniest part about that is most of the time, their problems aren’t even that bad in comparison to real problems. There are women and children being used in Nigeria as suicide bombers as we speak and you are mad because the person in the car in front of you didn’t move quickly enough. There are people out here that have real problems. The news reports will show you there are more important things to be pissed about.
Miserable people have developed an outlook and a perception of life based on habit and this habit has been based on experience. They have experienced events that they have labeled as bad and, now, try to avoid them at all costs. Don’t get me wrong, they try to have a good day. They will even say to themselves, “I am going to have a good day today.” And then what happens? They end up seething at something or going off on someone. It isn’t their fault. They were minding their own business, and someone started with them, someone else wronged them first.
They use this as a justification for reaction. Some go even further in their thought process and decide that others people’s actions were intentional and they can’t let someone else get away with negative behavior so they respond with negative behavior.
That is like trying to put out a fire using fire instead of water. How do you think that is going to help? This cycle seems asinine but the ego can’t help it. No, I am not referring to being egotistical. The ego is the stupid little guard dog you have in your head that yaps at every person passing by the gate. It’s bark is waaaayyy worse than its bite. Now, imagine that dog in the yard of your mind. Most people passing by aren’t even focusing on the gate, the dog, or the house…but there you are, yip, yip, yip; jumping to conclusions. For more information about the ego, please refer to my spiritual book, Real-life Enlightenment: Breadcrumbs For the Spiritual Seeker.
But, back to these miserable ass people. They haven’t figured out that they can’t control other people’s actions. The reality is: other people are going to do what they want to do at any given time. You can’t control people’s actions and behavior. You can only control your own behavior. This needs to be something that should be included in teaching children. If children learned this early enough, we wouldn’t have so many adults running around acting childish.
Who do you think you are that everything should go your way all of the time? Who the fuck do you think you are? This is a completely unrealistic expectation and because of it, you have trapped yourself in a cycle of suffering. Happiness, for you, will be fleeting and short lived often.
You are your own worst enemy. Nothing is happening to you. YOU are happening to you. You are doing it to yourselves. And it’s dumb and a waste of time. Life is too short to be angry all the time but you are choosing to be angry. You are choosing to be annoyed. You are choosing to focus on the bad instead of the good. It’s why you always see the bad…because you always look for it. You can’t see your blessings if you don’t look for them. You can never see the sky if you are so busy looking down.
For those of us who are actually rational, we have to live and work with these miserable ass people. So, to all of those readers who don’t know anyone like this, here’s a hint…it’s probably you. Lol.
But, wait, don’t get mad and don’t get offended. Here are some tips for you:
Be grateful: whatever God you believe in woke you up this morning. And just in case you don’t believe in God, you still woke up this morning. You have to count your blessings….literally. Shifting your focus from what you don’t like to what you are grateful for will, literally, rewire the neurological pathways that cause negative thoughts.
Don’t think only your own perspective is the correct way. There are seven billion people living here with you. They don’t all think like you….and that is ok.
Don’t sweat the small stuff. Decide what really needs to be addressed and what can slide. This doesn’t mean you are soft and letting people walk all over you. It just means you are not petty.
And lastly, chill the fuck out. We have to deal with you and the shit is annoying. Love you though!
Love and Light,
- Aisha The Goddess